Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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