apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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