He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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