Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry 586Mich hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(415): View more from California

WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!

(650): View more from California

LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!

Fav 4 1458 1225
share tweet
(212): View more from New York

that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me

Fav 22 1574 1229
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(216): View more from Ohio

So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.

(1-216): View more from Ohio

Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.

(216): View more from Ohio

Take that integrity

Fav 48 3346 973
share tweet
(601): View more from Mississippi

After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.

Fav 5 2998 1435
share tweet
(630): View more from Illinois

I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.

Fav 9 1580 2807
share tweet
(314): View more from Missouri

Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was

Fav 9 2713 1323
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(559): View more from California

I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.

Fav 6 1558 967
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(817): View more from Texas

My dog and I just went outside to pee together.

Fav 1 49 9
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(904): View more from Florida

All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off

Fav 0 15 67
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT