..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
