Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
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