Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
