I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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