Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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