At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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