found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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