We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
