he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize