Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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