Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
