so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
