so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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