After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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