We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize