But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
