Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
