You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Randomize
