Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
