i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
