we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
