Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
