She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
