She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
