i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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