All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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