I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
