I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
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8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
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What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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