even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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