I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
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