Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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