What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
