We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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