Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Come see our sink grown plant.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
