spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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