so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize