Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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