Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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