Joe is yelling at the trees again.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Do you remember whose house we're in?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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