I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
