Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
The chlamydia really affected his face.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
