i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize