I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
