Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
