why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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