We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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