hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
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