Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
