Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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